W. Steve Wilson

Santa to the Rescue

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In researching the history of the famous Christmas poem, A Visit from St. Nicholas, by Clement C. Moore, I had the occasion to access the archives of the Library of Congress. I was looking for a digital copy of the original manuscript, handwritten by the author. What I found was, to put it mildly—unexpected. Without fanfare or announcement, and after 200 years of keeping the documents secret, the correspondence between the War Department and Mr. Moore from late 1822 had been declassified and made available to anyone who could locate the files.

The records revealed a series of unexplained astronomical phenomena occurring from late November through December, affecting the area around Newport, RI. The most notable of the phenomena was a large object passing between the Sun and the Earth. Several amateur astronomers detected the object and reported it to the government. The War Department attributed the sightings to an “echo” of the transit of the planet Venus, which occurred on December 6, 1822.

The strange phenomena continued until the War Department stepped in and addressed the situation. The documents detailing the preparations, the deployment of troops, the resulting confrontation, and the intervention of a third-party military force that saved the day were deemed classified. To avoid public hysteria, the War Department contracted with Clement C. Moore to write and publish a fictional work that would at once entertain the public, obfuscate the actual narrative, and hopefully relegate the incident to the stuff of legend and myth.

I would suggest their efforts were effective. Until the papers were declassified and discovered, nobody had a clue as to what had happened.

Below I present the truth of the events that took place on Christmas Eve, 1822.

The Events of Christmas Eve 1822

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the towns
The troops were all mustered, no smiles, just frowns.
Their flintlocks were loaded, extra powder at hand
Hoping they’d survive through the night, to a man 

The children were nestled, all hidden away,
While mothers and grandmas held terror at bay.
And the older young boys, too young for this fight,
Stood next to their fathers to load muskets all night

When out on the field came a roar and a rush
The scouts were dispatched as steam rose from the slush
Away to the hideout, they took up their post
Peered through the spyglass, the position did boast

The light from the object flashed bright on the snow
The yellowish gleam cast shadows below,
The scouts reported a sight our force might just fear,
A rocket-powered sleigh and eight armored reindeer

The driver all clad in red plating and spikes
Against which we’d have not a chance with lead balls and short pikes
The craft did descend more rapid than hail
And a voice shouted out over the rocket’s hot gale,

"Now, DASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!
On, COMET! on CUPID! on, DONNER and BLITZEN!
Disperse to the flanks; take up your positions
Cast the shield wide, repel their munitions.”

The reindeer sped to surround our division
They threw up a shield to protect our contingent
With each of the eight, a platoon did connect
And we all learned right then they were here to protect

With a flash of bright light, we had our clear proof
The reindeer were soldiers from antler to hoof.
Their leader came down on a column of flame
“My name is St. Nicholas,” we heard him exclaim.

His red, spikey clothes boasted a pack on his back
He rose from his sleigh on a rocket of black
From the pack on his back, he deployed a device
And fired a bolt at the heavens, first once and then twice

The mask on his face did shield his expression
But his white flowing beard was trimmed with precision.
His red hat adorned with a white furry tassel,
He got right to work without much of a hassle.

He held in his hands two odd-looking weapons
He aimed them and fired them straight to the heavens
Two strong beams of light shot to the skies
A wind sizzled hot, the flash blinding our eyes

A bloated black object flew in from the west
We unleashed our muskets; we gave it our best
St. Nick gave a cheer and altered his stance
With him on our team, we might have a chance.

No words were then spoken, and we all went to work
We loaded and fired; we fought as berserk.
Finally, the black craft came down with a bang
And with the enemy gone, to the sleigh, the reindeer all sprang

Nick jumped in his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle
On a rocket’s hot flame, the sleigh flew like a missile
But we all heard his shout as he rocketed away
THE THREAT'S BEEN COMBATTED; ENJOY CHRISTMAS DAY!